They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
