hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
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she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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