so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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