Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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