sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I have post one night stand depression
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
