Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
