According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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