i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
