If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
