Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
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