4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
