She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
