Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
jump out the window naked night went bad
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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