Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Pooping to opera.
Randomize