also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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