Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
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