fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize