how can u be prego again
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
