I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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