Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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