All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize