Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk http://tfl.nu/mdkh
  Replies (3) Good night (1302) Bad night (575)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is. http://tfl.nu/53e5
  Replies (29) Good night (5007) Bad night (1596)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall... http://tfl.nu/htpj
  Replies (17) Good night (7019) Bad night (2189)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you. http://tfl.nu/3bx1
  Replies (13) Good night (879) Bad night (4379)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like. http://tfl.nu/kktd
  Replies (9) Good night (908) Bad night (3749)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): For future references, orgasms clear sinuses. http://tfl.nu/b2l7
  Replies (24) Good night (8020) Bad night (1683)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate http://tfl.nu/vfhs
  Replies (6) Good night (2482) Bad night (1703)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious. http://tfl.nu/wv8w
  Replies (6) Good night (681) Bad night (1551)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up. http://tfl.nu/0zw1
  Replies (4) Good night (1235) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  he is risen halelujah

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ (1-303): he is risen halelujah http://tfl.nu/sbcr
  Replies (6) Good night (1560) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights http://tfl.nu/amvj
  Replies (5) Good night (1101) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  I seemed to have misplaced my pants...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?.... (1-540): I seemed to have misplaced my pants... http://tfl.nu/s4v6
  Replies (5) Good night (1126) Bad night (428)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax? http://tfl.nu/w375
  Replies (2) Good night (614) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball http://tfl.nu/0g1i
  Replies (5) Good night (430) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule. http://tfl.nu/yheb
  Replies (0) Good night (439) Bad night (265)

Randomize