Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize