just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
