just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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