puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
