Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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