Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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