I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
