What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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