I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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