He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Houston, we have a blender
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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