I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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