When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
