Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
This baby is an asshole
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
