names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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