Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
This is the high leading the old right now
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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