Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
