Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
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He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
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I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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