dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
