I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize