What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
