What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Mom said you looked used
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.