i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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