Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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