I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
