just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex