Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up.  I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Yeah...you probably will...

  (248): View more from Michigan

  well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.

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  (248): Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up.  I think you need to come down here and take it in for me. (248): I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it (734): Yeah...you probably will... (248): well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year. http://tfl.nu/3k5k
  Replies (4) Good night (955) Bad night (1303)
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  (631): View more from New York

  If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org

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  (631): If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org http://tfl.nu/anvp
  Replies (31) Good night (948) Bad night (3294)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?

  (925): View more from California

  Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual

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  (408): hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened? (925): Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual http://tfl.nu/smzs
  Replies (6) Good night (4350) Bad night (567)
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  (209): View more from California

  ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?

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  (209): ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes? http://tfl.nu/mxbg
  Replies (50) Good night (1550) Bad night (4792)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.

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  (201): im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere. http://tfl.nu/ne04
  Replies (13) Good night (5213) Bad night (890)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.

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  (541): Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist. http://tfl.nu/jqdb
  Replies (18) Good night (5331) Bad night (952)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.

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  (321): I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident. http://tfl.nu/j6a8
  Replies (6) Good night (4546) Bad night (995)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.

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  (817): then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand. http://tfl.nu/4p59
  Replies (6) Good night (1382) Bad night (1032)
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  (585): View more from New York

  I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus

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  (585): I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus http://tfl.nu/97ca
  Replies (2) Good night (1707) Bad night (706)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.

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  (401): I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands. http://tfl.nu/2kp5
  Replies (20) Good night (1048) Bad night (2899)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.

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  (619): According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night. http://tfl.nu/q1q9
  Replies (2) Good night (862) Bad night (439)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops

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  (908): Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops http://tfl.nu/wq2e
  Replies (7) Good night (2518) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.

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  (262): She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor... (262): I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho. http://tfl.nu/4nj6
  Replies (8) Good night (1527) Bad night (713)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.

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  (615): No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day. http://tfl.nu/93vi
  Replies (3) Good night (680) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.

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  (802): You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago. http://tfl.nu/55qx
  Replies (2) Good night (700) Bad night (199)

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