He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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