This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize