have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
