Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Randomize
