Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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